Monday, December 12, 2016

Scanxiety

I am pretty excited to breathe a sigh of relief.  My prayers were answered and I am able to head into the Holidays with ... Finally some good news to share.

I had my very first PET after starting treatment.  Holy cow....They sure are right about "Scanxiety."


Those 24 hours of waiting felt like an eternity.  I hoped and prayed things were better.  I cannot feel my tumor anymore (was the size of a walnut), so of course my treatment was working.....but there was still that terrifying thought that it had spread elsewhere.  Here is a summary of my PET Scan:

1.  Interval resolution of the soft tissue mass at the inferior medial right breast with no residual FDG uptake within the lesion.  Also, there has been interval resolution of the FDG uptake that was seen throughout the spine and pelvis on prior exam.  Multiple sclerotic lesions are now seen scattered throughout the spin and pelvis consistent with treated osseous metastatic disease.  This is favorable progress compared to prior study.

2.  No lymphadenopathy identified.  No solid organ abnormality identified.

My soon to be Sister In Law Erin so graciously offered to be late to class to be there when I got my results.  She was there with me to hold my hand the afternoon I heard the horrific words Breast Cancer and she was there to hear the "Fabulous" news from my oncologist last Thursday.  There were definitely tears this day, but only ones of relief and happiness.




As I have described to friends and family, my cancer is not gone.  I am heading into remission and we can just hope that my cells remain dormant.  I will continue with the same treatment:  Menopause (brought on by a medication called Zoladex) and Tamoxifen.  Everyone differs, some stage 4 women only get a couple months out of Tamoxifen, some can get a couple years before their cancer becomes resistant.  We will just wait and see what mine decides to do.  Fingers crossed I have "stupid" cancer cells.  Hopefully they just cannot figure out how to survive without those hormones.  I will have my next scan in March.  She also draws "tumor markers" at my monthly visits, but that is not entirely accurate when it comes to resistance to medications.

I have learned a whole heck of a lot about Breast Cancer in these past few months.  I have joined many support groups where other young, vibrant, beautiful women are going through the same crap. Women in their 20's who aren't ever able to have babies of their own, Women who have young children just like me, Women who are very sick, women who are thriving with Stage 4.  In this short period of time I have already witnessed some of these beautiful woman lose their lives to this beast.  It makes me so so angry.  It only fuels my passion to kick cancer's ass and to advocate for those who cannot.  Who knows....maybe I will travel the world one day and scream from the mountain tops that STAGE 4 Breast Cancer NEEDS MORE!



I am once again, so incredibly thankful for each of you.  Thank you for all of the love.  We are so blessed.  The power of prayer is definitely a real thing, Thank you to everyone who prayed so very hard.  God blessed me with "stupid" cancer cells :)

love to all....Erin

Saturday, December 3, 2016

Halloween 2016

Halloween 2016

I have decided to not think about things like "could this be my last holiday"
I want to just live and not have that looming in the back of my mind.
I know a lot of women with stage 4 live in this fear, I refuse to let that take over my mind.  None of us are guaranteed tomorrow.  ALL of us should celebrate these Holidays like they are our last.

So of course we had a wonderful time celebrating Halloween this year as we would have in the past.

Halloween this year....The kiddos had a blast.
I randomly shopped the aisles at Target on Halloween and decided to be a wicked witch.  I went from not planning on dressing up to painting my face green and adding obnoxiously ginormous fake eyelashes along with a witches hat and cape.  
The best was when I picked up the kiddos at daycare!  Harrison loved it!  
He just smiled....he still knew it was me :)  I may have scared the SH*T out of one of the other little boys however.  Oops.

We continued with the tradition of hanging out with friends before trick or treating with pizza and adult cocktails!

And of course we went back to our old neighborhood to trick or treat.

Seriously this girl ROCKED her Cruella DeVille costume.  I will recommend to other Moms out there....patten leather heels for trick or treating in MN is NOT a good idea.  This poor girl learned a very important lesson:  high heels sure are cute...but dang they hurt by the end of the night.

And here is Carter as Rafael the Ninja Turtle.  He saw this costume in the window and knew this was who he wanted to be.  I tried oh so hard to get him to be a Dalmatian also.  I think the days of Mom telling him what he will be are over :)

Miss Lily....Too Cute!

Nana with Turbo.

Baby Tobin as a lumber jack.  So stinkin cute

The crew

Dalmatian on the loose!

Mommy and her babe


we had fun painting our face after Carter got home from school!

I think this is by far one of my favorite pictures EVER.  Harrison was NOT excited about his cute little outfit.

And one more of Cruella.  Seriously so cute!

Halloween 2016 will go down in the memory books.  Can't wait to celebrate MANY more with these munchkins.

(I HAVE to be here for next year....because like a crazy lady I already have the theme planned)